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Mar292010

Video of the Day!

Check out “Buttmachine” by That 1 Guy:

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I’ve never heard a song about butts make any more sense than this one. Thanks to Captain K, now I have.



Mar262010

New and Ruined

mothra godzilla 500px New and Ruined

This is going to sound horrible coming from a Captain of this glorious web site, but blogging is sort of ruined for me. It’s ruined because it was once really cool and now everyone is doing it and its lost its luster. Who else is doing it? I’ll elaborate; pretty much everyone.

- My hometown newspaper communicates to its readership through blogs more than stories. Back in the day, actual stories would grace its home page. Now it’s blogs centered on facebook updates, a bobblehead contest (gay), and what its like having kids.
- Mommy blogs are big now. Stay at home mom’s will blog just about anything. They actually found a way to sell out and promote products they’ve never used to its readers.
- Athletes are now blogging on ESPN. I really don’t want to hear what an athlete has to say about his performance on the field. I just want to see them play their sport and that’s basically it.
- Politicians are blogging all over the place. Do yourself a favor, find a few of these blogs and read the comments. You’ll realize our country is pretty fucked up. Not going to lie.

That’s just a small sample of people blogging. To me what was once really cool, now isn’t. I have this thing where when I get into something and it surpasses my perceived level of its coolness ultimately becoming a fad/trend, I lose immediate interest. Hard to explain, but here’s a few examples:
- Dave Matthews (was a fan circa 1993, stopped listening to them by 1998)
- Facebook (had an account in 2005, stopped using it in 2006)
- It’s Always Sunny (watched since 2006, ????)

I guess it’s the way I’m wired, but I can’t get down with trendy things. I hope I’m totally off on blogging, the world goes back to its senses and realizes blogs have a limited purpose, but that probably won’t happen. Regardless, I’m going to keep on chooglin here.

Does anyone else feel the same way??



Mar242010

The Vault

memovault The Vault

Due to the increasing number of comments on the Vault, the Captain’s have decided that it’s here to stay. Here’s a couple of good nuggets from the earlier days:

- Another Captain Kirk gem: Dictionary definitions for today’s man. “Cropdusting” and “dutch oven” cracked the 2009 version of Webster’s as a result.

- Captain Yar explains where General Tso’s came from. You can put a rest to the alley cat theory, but can’t deny its rationale.

- SI Swimsuit Rookies: The stories of the lives behind the hottest women in the world.



Mar232010

March Madness

aquaman March Madness

In case you’re not a die hard basketball fan (like the Captain’s) and want to do some bracketology, I’ve found just the thing for you. Thanks to our friends at the Herd, we can look forward to Superheroes vs. Supervillians Bracket.

Here at TCM the Captain’s are pulling for Captain America to take top prize because (1) he’s a Captain, (2) he represents America, and (3) he’s got an awesome get-up. Word has it Captain Yar is secretly pulling for Aquaman.

Get your vote on!



Mar222010

Video of the Day!

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Side Note: Loyal reader, O’Brien 2, recommended this guy to be our March Captain of the Month.

Another Side Note: Loyal reader, O’Brien 2, is on crack. Lots of it.



Mar192010

The divorce of Texas and Thomas Jefferson

Texas 20Logo The divorce of Texas and Thomas Jefferson

Texas. It’s a huge ass state that the U.S. fought for against the Mexicans in the Mexican War and was annexed quickly afterward as a result. It is a state where things are big – boobs, sports teams budgets, food, and people. It is a state where Bush came from. Enough said.

6a00d83451586c69e2011168971ba4970c 800wi The divorce of Texas and Thomas Jefferson

Thomas Jefferson. He wrote our Declaration of Independence and had a lot of influence on the Constitution and Bill of Rights. He was the 3rd U.S. President. He made the Louisiana Purchase (which put us closer to Texas) from France. He also impregnated his slave Sally Hemmings. He also rocked a nice blow out and was named man of the millennium (not falcon).

divorce poster The divorce of Texas and Thomas Jefferson

Divorce. A separation of two people or things usually over some crazy circumstance (money, cheating, etc.). Think Sally Field and Burt Reynolds. Think Jon and Kate. Think Raquel Welch. Think Seattle and the Supersonics. Think Texas and Thomas Jefferson?

According to the brilliant folks on the Texas School Board, Thomas Jefferson was too much of a leftist and will be left out of the state’s curriculum for History. Basically no kids for the next ten years will learn anything about Thomas Jefferson because the state believes he’s too much of a bad influence on its children. The guy only bought the land that enticed people to move west. He only created the document that gave us our freedom. Definitely no big deal, right?

I don’t know about you, but I’m at a loss here. What’s up with Texas?



Mar172010

Zach Galifianakis Hosts SNL

Hilarious:



Mar152010

Types of Bitches

lindsay lohan drunk 400a071907 Types of Bitches

We all know there are many bitches in the world (don’t tell Lindsay we used this pic – she’ll sue), but one little 3rd grader from Washington D.C. added about another 90 classifications to the list.

Here’s page 1 of the list that some teacher grabbed off the ground:

4406534065 6cd5214104 o Types of Bitches

Imagine what the other four pages looked like!

See if you can identify with any of these “new bitches,” bitches.

Thanks for loyal reader Gabbalicious for passing this along.


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