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Football, Sports
Oct172009

Pick of the Week

This weeks football match ups are the complete opposite in terms of excitement than last weeks. Giants/Saints, Vikings/Ravens, Bears/Falcons, Broncos/Chargers. And then there will be the blowouts. The Eagles will decimate the Raiders and the Jets well, watch out Buffalo. Rex Ryan lit a fire under the Jets D and you are going to be the unfortunate first team to have your heads ripped off at the Meadowlands.  Literally. Jets 38, Buffalo 9.

Pick of the week: Jets -9.5

Pick of the week record: 3-1

Side Note: Obama, you are now more played than “Who Lets The Dogs Out?” the summer it was released. This is not a good thing. Making an ESPN announcement about Hispanic heritage right before the Jets kickoff on MNF? Isn’t it about time you started being a president rather than a TV personality? Or have unemployment, the dollar, healthcare & financial reform, and the deficit become to unattainable?


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Random
Oct92009

Keep on Chooglin!

8c6876a62484f3fa5b3d8a25b Keep on Chooglin!


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Football, Lingerie Football League, Sports
Oct82009

Lets Talk Football!

A lot of last week’s pick was based on the amazing Majesty QB straight out of Buffalo. This blinded us to the fact that the Bills are still a horrendous team, who fired their offensive coordinator a week before the season started. Might as well bet against them for the rest of the season as they continue to lose the spread and game. Glad we are Jets and 49ers fans. There’s only so much depression that can be taken while rooting for the Mets all summer.

It has been discovered that Long Island Hempstead politicians not only want to rid themselves of the Islanders, they also don’t want any new team to enter, even if its a hot female team dressed in lingerie. The NY Majesty have been declined the opportunity to play at Nassau Coliseum, following a simmering brawl between Charles Wang (owner of the Islanders) and Nassau County KUNT Murray and other Hempstead politicians about the transformation of the Nassau Coliseum site and surrounding area into a modern 24/7 suburban center. And reminder to our readers, its not that he wants a new one – Nassau Coliseum is a piece of garbage (sorry Yar) – they NEED a new place to play.

l d3dc22c7d1e9455d9f954b2110d273eb Lets Talk Football!

So the NY Majesty now have to play all four of their games on the road. This means NY’ers dont really have a team. But hey…. is anyone really rooting for a team anyway? TCM is just excited to watch hot chicks wearing almost nothing beating each other for the small amount of revenue generated from gate receipts. If we had little Captains, we’d take them to the game.

This weeks pick: Colts -3.5. We’re just not a believer in “must win” games, accept that the Titans are not the same team as last year.

Pick of the week: 2-1


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Football, Lingerie Football League, Sports
Oct32009

Krystal Gray of the NY Majesty and the pick of the week

In honor of this weeks pick, the Bills @ -1.5, let us introduce you to Buffalo’s own incredible Krystal Gray, quarterback for the Nplayer01 Krystal Gray of the NY Majesty and the pick of the weekY Majesty.

4a050bcff2cce Krystal Gray of the NY Majesty and the pick of the weekTCM is proud to say a NY native will be play calling this up and coming team, given that she stepped up after Melissa Teixera resigned back to New England because she couldn’t take the heat in NY.  Welcome Krystal. This is the first of many posts to come.

Gray’s quote of the day: ” It comes down to whether you are a pipe or a diamond. Because pipes burst under pressure. Diamonds are formed under pressure.”


krystalbed Krystal Gray of the NY Majesty and the pick of the week

TCM’s pick last week: Bears -2

This weeks pick: Bills -1.5

TCM Pick of the week: 2-0


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Television, Video Games
Sep272009

New SNL Comedian Jenny Slate Drops F-bomb in Premiere

Check out this site for the best video out there.:

Jenny Slate marked her debut on Saturday Night Live last night by dropping the “f-bomb.” Slate was performing as a raunchy biker chick alongside Kristen Wiig on the show’s 35th season premiere when she said, “You frickin’ just threw an ashtray full of butts at my head. You know what, you stood up for yourself and I fucking love you for that.” Slate’s expletive was clearly not intentional, and her cheeks puffed up immediately after she said it– realizing a second too late what she really said.

Since this may be the last we see of her, the Captains would like to remember her for at least one other thing she did in her career prior to that faithful night she said a word that everyone up after 11:00 uses every day anyway.  From her days in Gabe and Jenny. Enjoy.



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Lingerie Football League
Sep262009

Lingerie Football League Trailer – Get Excited

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Football, Sports
Sep242009

JETS!, Cheerleaders, and this week’s pick of the week

Why do cameras never show cheerleaders? The only chance you get is when the cameras phase into commercials. And what comes up as the first commercial? Peyton Manning letting us know we need HD TV’s so we can see cheerleaders in better definition. Sony should play a commercial that has Peyton saying we need better TV’s to be prepared for the Lingerie Football League. That would sell me.

jets cheerleaders JETS!, Cheerleaders, and this weeks pick of the week

So Jets D! Who can stop them? It wont be a QB or a team. Only way I see it, Bart Scott is blinded by a fan in New Orleans through some ultra powerful lens, he momentarily sees spots and turns into Revis causing them to be knocked out for two quarters. But that’ll have to wait until next weeks column when we preview the leagues best offense vs the leagues best defense.

The Titans 0-2 record doesn’t show what the team has done. Collins and his offense have been pretty good. But good enough to score the first TD against the Jets D of the season? This Sunday we’ll find out. While I’d love to put money on the Jets, its hard to see the Titans going 0-3, and if they are 0-3 it’ll be a close game. A few field goals may be all that’s needed to win this low scoring battle. Plus rumors are out that Sanchez’s knee is hurt, so Id steer clear and just root for the team in green.

This week’s pick: Bears -2. Have you seen the Seahawks? And they may be without Hasslebeck, which drops them to scoring no more than 10 points. Even a bad Cutler can drive for 13 points in 4 quarters.

Honorable mention: Lions at +6.5. Yes. The battle of two awful teams. Lions/Redskins. Can one outscore the other by a touchdown? I doubt it. But I also wont put money on a team that hasn’t won since Captain Yar had his balls removed. If anyone’s wondering, that was a long time ago.

Last week’s pick Jets +4:

Captain Kirk: 1-0


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Issues, News
Sep212009

Health Care

This appeared in Tallahassee Democrat on Sunday:

“Obama’s health care will be written by a committee whose head says he doesn’t understand it, passed by a Congress that hasn’t read it, signed by a President that smokes, funded by a treasury chief who did not pay his taxes, overseen by a Surgeon General who is obese, and financed by a government that is nearly broke.”

What could possibly go wrong with Obama’s Health Plan?


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