Treasure Chest for the ‘Entertainment’ Category


Entertainment
Sep32010

Celebrities That Look Like Other Celebrities: Part 11

On our eleventh Celebrities That Look Like Other Celebrities post, we’re digging deep and throwing one out for sports and comedy fans alike. The first person is comedian and current sidekick to Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm, Jeff Garlin. The second person is ex-football player and current radio show host of Mike & Mike, Mike Golic.

haduken Celebrities That Look Like Other Celebrities: Part 11

Sure this isn’t as perfect of a fit as other entries, but it’s damn close. Outside of Golic being a bit more fit and Garlin having a better fro, there’s really no glaring differences. They both are actually funny and they both are fat which begs the question, are fat men just funnier (Farley, Belushi)?

Stay tuned for this series – we’ll tackle Will Ferrell’s twin soon enough…


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Food, Video
Aug272010

The Happy Chop!

Does anyone else feel like having sex with men after this?

Get the Flash Player to see this content.

Oh, and completely ignore the fact that this is a 100% rip-off of the Slap Chop.


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Music, Women
Aug252010

Scientific reasoning as to why Ke$ha looks like a stupid whore.

First let me start out that she looks like a retarded super slutastic version of Taylor Swift. With that said, I must ask this: Why does it always look like she literally just got finished filming a video for “Gag On My Cock”.

kesha Scientific reasoning as to why Ke$ha looks like a stupid whore.

We would like to break down as to why Ke$ha looks like a stupid whore. We will be using the mysterious powers of scientific arguments to do so.

Theory One
Scientific Idea
The main idea in this theory is that Ke$ha looks like a stupid whore.

Expectations
That Ke$ha truly is a stupid whore.

Observations
Upon viewing the subject in her natural habitat, we noticed that she was having a talk with some guy. After a few minutes, she kicked him to the curb because he didn’t look like Mick Jagger. We realized that she may not be a stupid whore after all. But, after a serious thinking session, we finally came to this conclusion.

Conclusion
We weren’t at first 100% sure that Ke$ha knows what Mick Jagger looks like. Many of us know Mick as a walking, talking skeleton. Since her and Mick Jagger are in the music business together, she must know and/or have crossed his path at least once. If she still wants to get boned by that bag o’ bones, then that for sure makes her a stupid whore. So therefore if you are a stupid whore then you most certainly must look like a stupid whore.

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Movies, Video
Aug192010

Machete

IGN released this super badass trailer for the super bad ass movie Machete staring my man, Danny Trejo. Check it out essay.

If you look fast enough, I think Linsday “Too Much Of A Pussy To Stay In Jail For Her Entire Sentence” Lohan’s titties make an appearance. You be the judge.


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Food
Aug172010

A History of Quiznos Advertisements

If you have never had a Quiznos sub before, then I feel bad for you. They are sandwiches that are ever delicious and smell excellent coming out of their infamous toasting oven conveyor belt. Kind of like a Leprechaun cooking bacon. Yes…exactly that. So, if you haven’t had one I suggest getting one or Captain Polish will attack your right nut ball with a series of rabbit attacks. I seen him do it. It was artistic like, almost.

Well, you have gotten this far in this article so I assume you are curious as to how Quiznos advertisements have changed throughout the years. Well, lets begin.

quiznos A History of Quiznos Advertisements

2002 – Like that guy who wore pants, instead of bushes
This was the first airing of a Quiznos commercial. It aired during the Super Bowl of 2002 letting the world know that they toast their subs. You wonder what made them think to use this type of commercial to introduce themselves to the world. Sure it has some humor to it but I probably would have done it differently. I probably would have had it titled, “Quiznos, like the first guy in the porn industry to shoot his load on a woman’s face“.

Get the Flash Player to see this content.

Rating: B / Could have been done better for their first commercial

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Drinking, Technology, Video Games
Aug132010

Greatest invention ever

Well it has happened ladies and gentlemen. It was only a matter of time, but it happened.

The Gamerator.

gamerator Greatest invention ever

Take a moment to study that photo. Looks like a normal arcade system correct? Well, it ain’t. If you will shift your eyes to the crotch area of the system, you will notice a beer tap. Yes, a beer tap. My question is why hasn’t anyone thought of this idea earlier. I mean, putting a keg inside a fully functioning arcade system? Amazing.

As well as the keg tap and video games, this piece of art comes with a 26″ flat panel HDTV, 2 conveniently-placed cup holders to house your beverage while playing, a trackball system and 2 joysticks for head to head drunken pissed off classic video game action. They also made this beast capable of hooking up to your PS3, 360, Wii, etc. as well as loading the machine up with Windows XP so you can “work from home” on those days where just going into work sucks. Which 60% of the time is always 100% of the time.

Oh, for those interested in the actual gaming part, here is a list of all the legitimate games:

TAITO Legends:
Space Invaders, Space Invaders II, Bubble Bobble, Elevator Action, Rastan, New Zealand Story, Plotting(aka Flipull), Jungle Hunt, Operation Wolf, Operation Thunderbolt, Rainbow Islands, Phoenix Colony 7, Electric YoYo, Zoo Keeper, Great Swordsman, Gladiator, Exisus, Plump Pop, Super Qix, Battle Shark, Continental, Circus, Volfied, Ninja Kids, Space Gun, ThunderFox, Tube It, Return of the Invaders, and Tokio.

Konami Classics:
Castlevania, Castlevania II, Castlevania III, Contra, Super C

Midway:
720 Degrees, Blaster Bubbles, Defender, Defender II, Gauntlet, Joust, Joust 2, Klax, Marble Madness, Paperboy, Rampage, Rampart, Road Blasters, Robotron: 2084, Root Beer Tapper, Satan’s Hollow, Sinistar, Smash TV, SPLAT!, Spy Hunter, Super Sprint, Toobin’, Vindicators.

Midway Deluxe:
Mortak Kombat, Mortal Kombat II, Mortal Kombat III, Xybots, NARC, APB, Cyberball 2072, Timber, Total Carnage, Pit Fighter, Wizard of Wor, Xenophobe, Primal Rage, Arch Rivals, Rampage World Tour, Kozmik Krooz’r, Championship Sprint, Hard Drivin’, Wakco, Badlands, Hydro Thunder, Off Road Thunder: Mud, Sweat, ‘N’ Gears, Race Drivin’, San Francisco Rush the Rock: Alcatraz Edition, San Francisco Rush 2049, S.T.U.N. Runner, Super Off Road.

Not gonna lie, pretty stoked for a beer and Mortal Kombat combo.

Get yours today for a low low price of $3,499. Start saving those empties you drunks.

Is it gay if your friend reaches in to pour a pint at the same time 2 of you are manning the arcade system? Stay tuned to find out.


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Television, Work
Aug122010

The reason Mad Men is so damn good

If you’ve been living under a rock the past three years, let me bring this to your attention: there’s a show called Mad Men on AMC that is probably the greatest show on TV right now. Why? Well, it’s all about an Ad Agency in New York City where everyone is banging everyone, people get drunk on the job, and big business deals are cut. If you like sex, partying, and business, you should probably be watching this show.

This is all fine and dandy, but the real reason it’s good is Joan Holloway.

joan holloway mad men style The reason Mad Men is so damn good

Need more proof??

joan The reason Mad Men is so damn good

Joan Holloway, played by Christina Hendricks, is the smart, sexy, office manager who literally runs Sterling Cooper Draper Price. The hottest thing on two legs in the show is also one of the most feared and respected. She’s had her affairs and has done her fair share of partying and firing. Hot sexy bad ass.

I can go on and on on how I think she’s bonerific, but I’ll spare you – especially since she’s married on Mad Men and in real life (to the Shnozeberry guy in Super Troopers). I just wanted to give you the secret to this shows success.

Next time you plop down on Sunday at 10 this fall to watch, you’ll see how Joanie steals the show and owns your attention. Unless you have a vagina. Then this post probably isn’t for you.


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If I had known then what I know now, Music
Aug92010

The Artist Formerly Known As Prince

Let me start by saying that Flintheart is not a big Prince fan. I respect him, but i’m not into his music. As most people know in 1993 he changed his name from Prince to an unpronounceable symbol (the “love symbol” which was a combination of the male and female symbols).

PRINCE The Artist Formerly Known As Prince

It was big news back than, but since every media outlet began referring to him as “the artist formerly known as Prince” my young self didn’t understand what was happening. I thought he had changed his name to, “The Artist”.

In retrospect as I thought about this as an adult I realized how much of an amazing fuck you move this was. The man changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol! Clearly he thought the media would be flustered discussing him and would have to print the symbol on the page or show it on tv when discussing him. This all backfired though with the artist formerly known as Prince bullshit.

TCM would still like to commend Prince for trying something so ridiculous and absurd.


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