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Treasure Chest for the Baseball Category


Baseball
Jun22009

Matt Wieters Facts

If you don’t know who Matt Wieters is here’s a brief introduction:

1- Sliced Bread Is Actually The Best Thing Since Matt Wieters.

2-In The Off Season, Matt Wieters Hunts Predators In The Jungle For The U.S. Government. With A Spoon..

3- Matt Wieters Once Hit A Home Run With Captain Polish’s Mustache. (Captain Polish looks like Ted Nugent)

nugent Matt Wieters Facts

4- Spock Traveled Back In Time, Again, To Watch Matt Weiters Play His First Game In An Orioles Uniform.

5- Matt Wieters Went To The US Virgin Islands On Vacation, They Are Now Referred To As “The Islands”.

In summary, he’s the greatest prospect MLB has seen in well over a decade and has officially been added to the Orioles roster. He’s noted as being a better Joe Mauer, with power. And yes, Mauer currently has 11 homeruns in less than 30 games played, while batting .414. This stat is only bested by the fact that Adam Dunn has more home run’s than the Nationals have wins. Think about that one for a second.

For more Wieter’s facts


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Baseball
May12009

B***h T**s

Have you read the new book on A-Rod by Selena Roberts? If you haven’t much like most of the world, you’ll find that the 2005 Yankees used to refer to A-Rod as “Bitch Tits”. That’s right, “Bitch Tits”. A-Rod supposively has “Bitch Tits” because he took steroids for a time period that can range as little as 3 years or as long as 15 years.

What are “Bitch Tits” you ask? These are “Bitch Tits”:

fight club id by psychol bob B***h T**s

A-Rod, or “Bitch Tits” is now in the same category as Bob from Fight Club. Incredible.

This captain gave him the benefit of the doubt months ago, but you just can’t pass up on the opportunity to rag on “Bitch Tits”. We certainly do wish Mr. A-Rod good luck this season. We also can’t wait to hear Peter Gammons refer to him as “Bitch Tits” after he hits a walk off homer.


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Baseball, Food
Mar232009

The 4889 Calorie Burger

Just as trans fat bans began sweeping the northeast, the West Michigan Whitecaps, a minor league  team, decided to give the middle finger to New York City, stating  “We’re proud of our blubber bellies and enormous love handles! Go eat your salads and run your marathons, We’re taking one of these all the way to the couch!”  And on the sixth day they created the Fifth Third Burger. Coming in at a whopping 1.66 lbs, this fine burger is filled with 299 delicious grams of fat, five days worth of your sodium intake and 198 grams of protein!

Bring grandpa and the kids, its time to keep america fat.

ft burger 300x225 The 4889 Calorie Burger


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Baseball
Mar72009

The World Baseball Classic

There’s a lot of controversy and opinion that surfaces from the World Baseball Classic (the “WBC”), mainly focusing around the premise that injuries could occur , which would sideline the player for a given time prior to, or during, the MLB season. The Mets sent 16 players to the WBC, more than any other team, which could become dentrimental should the players not be prepared by missing Spring Training, or by becoming injured. This Mets fan is still a supporter.

The WBC creates an atmosphere and global presense not seen since Michael Phelps smoked dope in the middle of the 400m medley, only to come back and win in world record time. It makes a game, rather than a player or syringe, to take center stage. Most of all, it allows Mets fans to cheer for Brian McCann, Chipper Jones, and Shane Victorino. It allows a Yankee fan to cheer for Youk and Pedroia, things that would never occur due to the overwhelming hatred/bias built into the divisions. And in all reality, most of these players don’t choose where they wish to play – they are thrown into the divisional fire and try not to be burned. In today’s world, we have many uncertaintities, what certainty we do have is that the USA still remains the best country in the world. These are our boys and they are not playing for money, a new contract, or their own selfish needs. They play for our troops overseas, the pride of their fellow countrymen, and the three best colors in the world: Red, White & Blue.

usa The World Baseball Classic


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Baseball
Feb242009

Obama Stadium

With Citi on the verge of some sort of collapse it will be nationalized or become, in one way or another, a government enterprise. This begs the question: What will CitiField be called when the US taxpayer owns Citi? Here are some thoughts:

1. US Postal Service Stadium – Free shipping on Mets products that fit in your mailbox every Monday
2. Amtrak Arena – Sandwich Sunday Special! Free bar car ticket for an Amtrak sandwich.
3. FDIC Field – Purchases insured up to $250.
4. The AIG Playing Field
5. Fannie Field – One free subprime loan with purchase of a hotdog!
6. US Marine Training Facility – If you enlist you get a free Mets blanket! Or a Mets branded cape! The new fad!
7. Energy Star Arena – Free Mets branded lightbulb giveaway day on Wednesday!
8. Socialist Stadium – Where all Stadium restaurants are government owned! Pensions galore!

2008 2 citifield 300x212 Obama Stadium


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Baseball
Feb182009

So what?

Everywhere you look there is a story about Alex Rodriguez and his steriod use. So what? The guy made a mistake. Big deal. But it is a big deal to everyone in the sports world…

Did you know that the list of modern day superstars that might not make the Hall of Fame consists of Barry Bonds, Sammy Sosa, Mark McGwire, Roger Clemens, and Alex Rodriguez? What’s a HOF when you’re already missing the man with the most hits (Pete Rose) and now you can’t have the guy with the most career homers (Bonds), the first man to break Maris’s 61 homers (McGwire), the dude with the most 60 home run seasons (Sosa), the winningest right-handed pitcher in 50 years (Clemens), and the youngest person to amass 500 home runs (Rodriguez)? This ain’t right or is it?

Yes. These guys took steroids. There’s no doubting that. TCM commends A-Rod for having the balls to come forward to admit it unlike Clemens, Bonds, and McGwire (I bet all three are wishing they took a different route). But you know, when it all comes down to it, these guys didn’t do anything wrong.

In baseball, players have always seeked any edge they could find to one-up themselves against their opponents. In the dead ball era, pitchers “doctored” the ball so it would dance (and so did Kenny Rogers in the 2006 WS). Ted Williams was the first to wear batting gloves to improve his grip (later in his career). Eye black is used by many to reduce glare. Modern day ball players add so much body armor that they don’t mind being hit with a ball. Why is this all different than steroids?

It isn’t. MLB took strides to maintain the games integrity when it seemed fit. Now is that time and MLB doesn’t know what to do with this current situation of steroids.

None of these players that took steroids should deserve the wrap they’re getting. MLB never had a stance on steroids until now. They have no right to criticize these players because this act, steroids, was overlooked as baseball recovered from a very dramatic strike, a strike that the home runs hit by two who juiced helped a nation forget.

So maybe it’s time to turn away from blaming the baseball players and begin focusing on the MLB itself. It’s also time to release the names of the 103 other players that tested positive for steroids as well. We have a right to know. Not to bad mouth the guys, but to separate fact from fiction.

So writers and other people who suck, let A-Rod off the hook. Give him a pat on the back. He actually helped break the story of the decade – “MLB Concerned With Profit, Expansion, Image – Forgets Humility, Past, Integrity.”


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Baseball, Sports
Feb152009

The re-emergence of the Mets through Luis Castillo

Girls are reappearing from their winter hibernation. Snowmen are becoming nothing more than 2 old buttons and a half eaten carrot (I was hungry). And bars are restocking for the comeback of the daily sports game. Yes folks, spring training is back, and opening day is right around the corner.

Don’t dwell on the past. It no longer matters. What matters is 1969, 1986, and today. A championship is what makes or breaks a season, and its all NY fans truly care about.

The Mets have created a magnificent core of Reyes, Wright, Santana, and Beltran. I have no doubt that these four, all at the peak of their careers, will each have another outstanding season. Two gold gloves, and a cy young. A bigger Citi field will only help Santana’s quest and prove Beltran has amazing defensive skills. This is all not to mention a great new closer, still in his mid 20′s, to lock down tight games. And no more Heilman!

What will make or break 2009 will be the re-emergence of our second baseman recently plagued with injury, Mr Castillo. And I believe he will be good, if not back to top form in 2009. Luis knows his role, either leading off, putting Reyes second/third (Beltran?), or batting second behind Reyes. He doesn’t need home runs or doubles. He needs hits and walks. He needs a high on base percentage. Leave the dirty work to Wright, Delgado, and Beltran. Or if Church is back to pre-concussion form, let him knock in a few. If Castillo can hit .290, have an OBP of .370-.390 and stay healthy we really have a shot. Don’t underestimate the fish, or the returning champs. But with a healthy hitting second baseman, watch out Boston – we’re about to start bringing the spotlight back to the best city in the world.


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