#5 – Julie Benz
If you all watch the show, Dexter amongst other shows/movies she has been in you will know she is pretty hot. Her roles are usually the same throughout her career (well, from what I’ve seen). An innocent woman that is out for the better good. Hence, Dexter, Rambo and The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (not so innocent in the last one). So yea, this is probably the one you’d want to marry. Hell, what am I saying…if I married any of these actresses I’d consider myself winning.
Captain Flintheart likes his female celebrities two ways. Either fantastic looking and classy as hell like the actresses of yesteryear (more on that on a future post) or fully stocked, thick and robust. As a rule I’m not interested in ridiculously skinny girls, ESPECIALLY if you can see her ribs. In fact, you may remember I was the only TCM member to vote pro-boobs in the epic debate. I think it will be easy to see which actresses I chose fall into what category.
5. Natalie Portman
Natalie Portman isn’t hot…she’s beautiful.
Bonus Points: She starred in 3 Star Wars movies.
TCM is not above posting Ass shots…clearly. Every Wednesday our friends over at The Chive celebrate hump day in style. We figured we’d get the week started for you with some inspiration from their latest archive.
You can check out the rest of their excellent post here.
Hawaii. Duh, no shit.
Here’s 6 reasons why (In no particular order, of course):
Kiana Tom
Why She’s Happy: She is a TV host, a fitness expert and was once an Oakland Raider’s cheerleader. Note the emphasis on was. That’s why she’s happy. Oh, and much like the rest of the girls on this list, she’s posed in Playboy.
Since you can never have enough of her butt, we figured we would treat you all to a second helping of some Kim-K-Ass.
You’re welcome.
There’s a few things we like here at TCM – farts, boobs, butts, beer, and photos of somewhat-attractive-women-who-get-rejected-on-national-television. What?
Yes. That’s a web site dedicated to rejection faces from contestants on the bachelorette. Faces that look so scorned and hurt, but considering the source (a show that has 15 women vying for one complete douchebag bachelor the production company found milling around a Banana Republic deciding which canvas bag to purchase) look incredible and laughable:
and…
Ladies, if you’re looking for love, don’t go on the bachelor because the hurtful look you display when you are rejected will be enjoyed by many on this web site. Instead, go to a farmer’s market or a baseball game – your odds are better. Fuck, if you believe in odds, go to Las Vegas (or Atlantic City if you’re poor).
That’s the closest the Captain’s will get to doling out love advice even though the fake holiday of Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. We’ll continue with the bashing of douchebags till the end of days.
