Mall Kiosks

Whoever developed this concept should be murdered in the most brutual fashion possible. The mall is never a pleasurable experience and like most men I wanna get in and out as fast as I can (insert joke here). If there is one thing I hate, it’s those damn kiosks. I honestly don’t know how most of them make any money. I never see anyone interested in getting their fortune told or buying a framed limited edition John Stamos lithograph.

It’s not their mere existence that bothers me. It’s the overly aggressive salesman that sometimes work there. Why can’t they be satisfied with the rest of those hourly wage fuckers that work there? Your getting paid to watch movies on your lap top, text, or people watch at a place that houses some of those most attractive women your sorry ass state ever sees. No, they have to harass you for a sale.

I always try to be as much of a dick to them as possible. Sometimes you walk by and they ask you if you want a free sample and you blow them off, that’s not enough for them. They will say, “oh, can I ask you a question?” or “Excuse me!?!?” tell them to fuck off or to get a real job. That bullshit kills me. Just because your “store” is in the middle of the mall walkway doesn’t give you the right to harass me as I’m walking by. Imagine if you walked by Dick’s Sporting Goods and some ass muncher stood out front of it’s entrance yelling, “hey buddy you need a new cup?” or, “lady, how about buying your kid a pair of roller skates?” That shit would fly for all of 12 minutes till that dude got knocked the fuck out.

Why do we give these kiosks so much leeway?