#5 – Julie Benz
If you all watch the show, Dexter amongst other shows/movies she has been in you will know she is pretty hot. Her roles are usually the same throughout her career (well, from what I’ve seen). An innocent woman that is out for the better good. Hence, Dexter, Rambo and The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (not so innocent in the last one). So yea, this is probably the one you’d want to marry. Hell, what am I saying…if I married any of these actresses I’d consider myself winning.
Celebrate Labor Day with Alison Brie (of NBC’s Community and AMC’s Mad Men fame) and Gillian Jacobs (from Community).
Two women I would love to have labor resulting relations with… sans labor.
There were two major stories in the news this week pertaining to Hollywood. The first was the Oscars which I found to be incredibly useful as a sleep aid on Sunday night with the exception of that wonderful lunatic Kirk Douglas. It was so awkward and wonderful that I just couldn’t look away, even though I felt I should. I kept thinking to myself that we were all watching someone die on stage. And I mean that literally, not figuratively. I half expected that I would see him in the “For those we lost” montage they have at the end of the show each year. The second major story in the news this week is the other wonderful lunatic in Hollywood, Charlie Sheen. I can’t say enough about how much I love this guy. I just think that it’s fantastic that for once we can see a star being completely honest about his life. I mean he isn’t saying anything that we the public don’t already know to be true. He is rich, his life is awesome and better than ours will ever be, he loves drugs and porn stars, both of which he can afford and he is fucking awesome. Name one thing about that that isn’t true or isn’t what you would be doing/thinking if you had several million dollars in the bank. Many people are appalled, but I think fuck yes! We should look up to this guy. When most of us see a porno we just crank one out and then move on. Charlie says fuck that, I’m gonna call this whore and make her reenact this scene with me. Then I am going to do some blow and watch Jaws on my huge fucking yacht. Fuck yes!
This one developed via a disagreement with my girlfriend. We were watching a movie where I was convinced comedian Louis CK was featured in. Turns out I was wrong, it was Matt Walsh who you might know from small parts in Old School and The Hangover or perhaps the cult 1990′s TV show, The Upright Citizens Brigade.
Turns out all balding red headed men with goatees look the same. Either way they are still more attractive than Khloe Kardashian.
You all remember Voltron…I mean Power Rangers, don’t you? Last year we followed up with the Pink Ranger to see where she’s at these days. Turns out she got hotter.
Score.
This time we’re checking in with the Green Ranger to see what he’s up to.
So it appears he’s become an MMA fighter…no shocker there. What I’m more surprised by is his sweet tattoo.
Does that say “Jesus Didn’t Tap” (out)? That’s right, did you forget? Jesus is hardcore, mother fuckers.
You can go on over to the Urban Shogun to read more. Thanks to Doug for sending this our way.
Since you can never have enough of her butt, we figured we would treat you all to a second helping of some Kim-K-Ass.
You’re welcome.
This one is a no brainer. Khloe Kardashian looks like The Predator.
The resemblance is striking!
Fortunately for us, Kim Kardashian and her prize winning ass don’t look anything like The Predator.
Well, in roughly 8 hours, 2010 will be dead. Forgotten and dead. What a better way than to showcase some of our best crap from the year they called two thousand ten.
Captain Polish touches on a hilarious issue in this country. The War on Fat Kids
TCM finally brings an end to the epic debate: Boobs vs. Butts.
Once again the mysterious powers of science unfortunately proved that the Dinosaurs were murdered.
Check out when we try and use the mysterious powers of science to figure our as to why Ke$ha looks like a stupid whore.
Conan O’Brien was out of a job, so we compiled a bunch of his best field work.
There are some quality bands that you listened to in the past, well remember one of them here!
If you could live in one “fake” house, I guarantee 99% of you would say The Ghostbuster’s Firehouse.
And you thought betting on who’s poop will be bigger was fun, check out these rules for betting on the TV show GUTS from Nickelodeon fame.
Captain Flintheart is friends with someone named Leroy. Here is one of his phone calls.
The muppets are funny. These people are funny looking.
What the hell is up with Punxsutawney Phil and his gang of furry friends?
We lost a Captain this year, which is why he was our Captain of the Month for February.
Here are some guidelines as to how to properly name your bong.
Captain Polish offers his fatherly advice to graduating seniors. I’m pretty sure flushing your system before taking a drug test is one of those pieces of advice.
You know the finishers that wrestlers use in the ring? Well what if we used them in everyday life?
Komodo dragons were specifically designed to kill shit.
I officially gained a lot of enemies doing a Top 10 on movies and their sequels.
Captain Warbucks counts down the Top 5 pitchers from the Little League Baseball Championship Series for the NES. Better late then never.
I love being naked. So, I made a list this past summer of the Top 10 things to do naked.
Top story of the year was undoubtedly the vuvuzela. Here is 5 things to do with that goddamn vuvuzela.
Energy drinks are great, when drank at the appropriate time. Right before a colonoscopy is not one of those times.
Sharks will eat you up, no jokes. We scoured the globe to find 5 monsters that could eat a shark. We came up with some interesting results.
The world is going to end. It will most likely not be one of these ways.
