All churches need to get rid of their stained glass makers and hire this Canadian woman immediately. Think of it, how many more people men will actually show up to church if there was this instead of Jesus and Mary in the glass. Here is our letter to Mr. Pope asking to hire this woman:
Dear Mr. Pope,
We have stumbled across something that would make your “business” highly profitable. A Canadian woman is your Saving Grace (how funny is that, a Canadian Woman…not God or Jesus). She makes stained glass. Now before you toss this letter away thinking that all of your churches are covered, think again. If you visit her website: http://theycallmewilson.webs.com you will see what we are talking about. Think about it Pope, do you know how many more people will actually show up to church with this art surrounding them? You can double or even triple your profits. Sex sells sir…o yes, I just went there.
Our company, TCM, are willing to start a shuttle company with designated pickup and drop off points for these new church goers, for a small fee of course. With the influx of new attendees, your churches then could have people pay for parking and/or if they still want, pass around those awesome donation baskets. There Is No Such Thing As A Free Lunch….or church in this case.
Mr Pope, if you still are not on the same page as us, then attached you will find something to sway you to the right side of the fence.
God Bless and Amen,
The Captains Memos
p.s. We apologize that it is not sexy little boy stained glass…we just think that these will go over a lot better with the overall consensus. See attached:
A 27 year old Maryland woman and her husband were feeling adventurous and decided to hook a sex toy (aka dildo) to a sawzall. That sounds like a good idea on paper, but they forgot to remove one dangerous piece from the tool. The blade. Lets say after a few minutes of extreme power tooling the blade eventually cut through the sex toy and…yea, you can figure it out.
